Healthy Relationships

I’m no relationship expert by any means, but I have figured out a thing or two over the years. I don’t want to imply my relationship is perfect because it’s not. I do, however, think I am involved in a healthy, happy, and bless relationship. Holiday Party 2018

I think we get to a point in our lives where we are comfortable, little things start slipping, we lose tough with our feelings, and why we started loving the person we are with. So, y’all, to keep things happy and healthy, here is what works for us!

  1. We are friends. Sounds silly, right? Y’all, this is sooooo important. People forget that their significant other started as a friend. We lose sight of the fact that we enjoyed being around this person because they made us laugh. They were there when we needed a shoulder. We just enjoyed their company and then somewhere down the line we fell in love with them. We put so much pressure on the romance of it all, we forget why we are in this to begin with! Yes, Matthew and I share romantic dates and all that mush, but what I love the most is I know I have a friend for life.
  2. Share responsibilities! Whether you both work, one works and one stays home, whatever. Share the responsibilities that come with living together. Matthew and I both work full time. A lot of the time neither of us want to do anything after work, but we manage. We take turns cooking dinner, doing dishes, and we clean the house together. Granted, there are individual things we both do that the other doesn’t. I DO NOT mow the lawn. I wouldn’t know how to even if I tried. I do the laundry. I also literally scrub everything with Magic Erasers. They are the best. What I am getting at though is that you don’t want everything to be put on one person. Share the responsibilities and then we don’t feel so burnt out that we can’t focus on the relationship.
  3. This one seems like, “duh,” but remember to share a meal together. Our lives are busy. I can’t imagine people who have families, kids and stuff to add into the mix. Matthew and I make sure we sit down at least once a week and have dinner together, watch a movie, and relax together. Most nights, however, one of us will cook, but then we kind of go separate ways and do our own thing. This is totally okay. We have a good balance with this. Sometimes we need to set aside electronics, phones, games, whatever is controlling our lives at that time, and simply bond. Matthew and I are big on current events and politics, so that is often  what our dinner night converstations are.
  4. Share a hobby. This can be difficult sometimes. We generally attract people opposite of our personalities, so finding common ground in the hobby department can be a struggle. Matthew and I share a love for gardening. It’s unfortunate we cannot do this all year! Anyway, we both love seeing the results of hard work, and there is something oddly satisfying about pulling weeds from your garden! This is something we look forward to doing every year. On a side note, we also love watching reality tv shows and yelling at the people on it, as if we know what we are talking about! 😉 Lake of the Ozak 2017
  5. Give eachother space. This can get hard when you live together obviously, but you can make it work. Even if Matthew and I are both sitting in the living room, a lot of the time we are doing two different things. For instance, right now, I am blogging and he is playing some awful computer game called “Everquest.” We just sit, doing our own thing with the tv playing in the background. We also make sure to spend time with friends. Yes, we share friends, but then we also have separate friends. This is super important! Often, after spending too much time with someone, we tend to get annoyed, there’s tension, and every little thing gets on your nerves. So, space is super important!

So, like I said, I’m no expert, but this is what works for Matthew and I! Until next time, y’all!

Sincerely, Toni

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